Male Body Image: The Naked Truth


I have people message me
on Instagram, saying, “You’re really slim.
I like your hair. “The only problem is,
I’d break you.” I’m walking on the beach.
Everyone’s just turning, looking at me, like, “Ah.” I’m not even big. I starve myself… Wow. ..which I have to do, to help my
body to eat itself. All right, fat boy?
Oh, hold off. He wants a sausage. As I’ve got older, I’ve come to
accept that the one thing that I can’t change
on my body is my penis. Where we stand at the
moment in 2018, for guys, there’s a massive,
massive pressure for us all to
physically look like, maybe, a Greek god. In order to be masculine or
attractive, you should be well-built. You can’t show any weakness. You can’t show any feelings,
you can’t show any softness. You have an expectation
to be strong. Flat stomachs, abs, muscles… Looking great, looking groomed. The ideal body type is definitely
six pack, puffed-out chest. Oh, yeah. Shredded. “He’s ripped.” It was always pushed into my brain,
“You have to look a certain way.” It does play with your head
quite a lot. I think, “Nah, I could be bigger.” Me wanting to look a certain way, that stems from childhood, really. My dad always said to me, “You have
to look physically strong.” And he drilled that into me
from a very young age. I’m kind of OK with my physique,
but it’s that thing of striving for perfection even though I know I’ll never
have perfection. I was a 30 waist, then it
was a 32, then a 34. Then, people started making comments
about, “Oh, is he pregnant?” It was always a bit of fun,
but somewhere in the back of the head, rings a bit of
truth. It hurts. I wanted to do something about it. Just puts that fear into you of making a change and failing. People assume that when you’ve got
an eating disorder, you look skeletal. That you look incredibly thin. But I was never like that. I could look just, like,
a perfectly healthy weight and people wouldn’t know
that I had bulimia. When I was young, I was bullied
for my appearance. I was very, very small and skinny
and that never ended, five years at school. I’ve eventually weighed 8st now
since I was 11, that’s not changed. I’ve kind of just got taller
and stretched out. Growing up as a black man,
I feel that there is yeah, a sort of, stereotype. In the way we’re seen, as well. I could come out the gym one day, I’m in my tracksuit, you know,
I’m sweating out, people just think, like,
“Oh, yeah, it’s a big black guy “walking behind me,” or something, and then they cross the road. I don’t know,
it’s just quite weird. A couple of times I’ve been stopped
in my car, as well. Told to come out the car,
and then straight away it’s like, “Ah, yeah, you’ve got
a bit of size on you, mate. “I’ll need to put these
handcuffs on you.” I am someone who has always
struggled with body image. I was around 15 years old. My parents were diagnosed
with cancer. I shut myself off from the world,
because I didn’t want everyone to see how much
my family was in pain. And I was already dealing
with everything else that a 15-year-old deals with –
identity, sexuality. I was overweight.
I did get teased. People used to say that when I
walked, it caused earthquakes and all these layers just built
up on top of me. I remember one moment after school,
I just ate so much food that I was naturally sick. Afterwards, I had this
feeling of, “I’m empty,” and that feeling
became an addiction. Kids would tell me in school
I was anorexic, that my parents starved me. One day there was four lads
on both sides of the corridor. I was on my own.
I had just got out a lesson. Two picked me up by the arms,
took me up the stairs, put me over the banister, sellotaped me there and left me. I was so lightweight,
I stayed there. It took two teachers to get me
down, but I was there for about half an hour. And it was in a crowded corridor,
so, obviously, you had everyone walking past, laughing as they went
along and it just felt like torture. I ended up going home and crying
to my mother the whole night. I turned around to my mum at one
point, and said, “Did you do anything while
pregnant with me? “Why am I this way?” At the age of 17, I went to the doctors to get help
for my bulimia. I was turned away
because I was a boy. And I was told that I didn’t
have an eating disorder, it was stress. People assume that teenage boys
are just confident, and that they don’t have issues with
their image or their body image. From that, I was just stuck
in this spiral that I just couldn’t get out of. And during that time, when I went
to the bathroom to be sick, I thought, “This is how you
will end your life. “This eating disorder
will kill you.” And I was OK with that. I tried these extreme diets. I was taking fattening, gaining
pills that were costing me hundreds of pounds a month. I was eating KFC, McDonald’s… ..breakfast, lunch and dinner. I only gave up after about
eight months of doing that. I was getting nowhere. My dad, he used to lift
weights, as well. But he wasn’t serious about it,
like I am. I used to go in the shed,
take his weights. I was probably about 14. I just started lifting in my room,
and then started getting big. My training stopped
quite dramatically. I was 25. I came off my bike. My leg was literally just broken
in three places, like, mangled. I was in a wheelchair
for quite some time. I went back skinny. I had to learn to walk again. I had this determination, like,
the doctors, they’re saying to me, “You’re not going to walk
for 12 months.” I did it in about five. I was determined. I needed
to get back in the gym. Look at me, like, my clothes
are all hanging off me now. And so that was part of the drive. When I was younger,
I was quite sporty so I played football
five times a week. I was 9.5st when I was 19, 20. 24, 25 mark is when I just stopped
playing football altogether and never done any
exercise after that. I started eating takeaways. I stopped looking after myself and
the weight just started piling on. At my heaviest, I was up to 20st. I had no confidence. There’s a lot of pressure on men
to look a certain way, and that means that we like
to put on the front that we’re happy,
we’re big, we’re proud. And then the “fat boy”
names start coming in. Can say, “Oh, it’s just
a joke,” or banter. I used to wear a bra,
wore a thong. You know, I’d run around naked
or I’d draw stuff on my belly, I’d shave all my hair off. Just, I wore a gimp suit. Yeah. If I was taking the mick out myself, they couldn’t do it to me
and make me feel crap. I’ve watched both my brothers
be taken to the gym and train and get big. But my dad, if I ever came down without a T-shirt on, “Your arms
getting a bit skinnier.” There would be comments. So as soon as I hit 16 he took me to
the gym, introduced me to training. To look a certain way
you have to sacrifice certain things and part of that is…pleasure. You have to eat a certain amount
of food, a certain time of day. When I eat, I’m so look forward to eating,
halfway through the meal, I start getting depressed
because the meal is going to be over soon
and I’m still hungry. I think I’m more addicted
to me pushing me. That comes from the other
insecurities in my life. I have a disability. My right foot is three shoe sizes
smaller than my left and I have four toes on my right foot and my right leg is five centimetres shorter than my left. Stopped me joining the police force,
stopped me joining the fire brigade and all those kind of things
which test one’s self and not everybody can do. It ain’t easy. Every day I go like that,
“What am I doing? “Can’t I just like, just be
normal?!” We all have issues with body
image and that’s why I think it’s so important to have these
conversations. Hi. Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you. I see someone who’s incredibly
confident and got great muscles. But is there ever a time
when you think, “Hey, do you know what? Give
myself a break this year.”? I-I have that thought literally every day… Yeah. ..that I go, “Is this
actually worth it?” I keep going, “Yeah. “Yeah, yeah, it is.” Four-five years of my life
I had bulimia. OK. From a teen up until I was 21.
Oh, wow. It was for five years. Everyday was a routine then. Right. Now I avoid anything
that involves controls over any sort of shift in diet. I kind of see there’s similarities
between maybe having an eating disorder and doing what I do –
that I starve myself. Wow. Which I have to do to get my body
to eat itself… Yeah. ..before I stand on stage,
and even though it’s unpleasant, I force myself to do it. You’re talking about stuff that people don’t want to talk about. Just starting the conversation
can be so difficult for everyone because not everyone wants
to talk, not everyone is ready. We’ve seen the conversations before. We’ve seen it with women over the
last ten years or so and now it’s just a natural process. We can start off in those
conversations too. Women have always had to look a
certain way and act a certain way. Society has now said that men
need to look a certain way, just like women. Now men are able to talk
more about body image. One thing I’ve learned is
that everybody thinks they’re alone. Everybody thinks what they’re going
through is, is some unique. Yeah. And it’s just for them and
no-one else has experienced it. And it’s not, it’s not true. I mean, it’s always down to the
same thing, isn’t it? Just having an open and honest conversation.
Exactly. Yeah. I couldn’t agree more.
Yeah. Guys have become so obsessed
with what they look like now. I never thought there’d be a day
where people bothered about getting hair transplants and veneers
and all that sort of stuff. I think that the pressure
on men particularly now has increased a lot. We’re always presented with images,
whether it’s online, on TV. We start comparing ourselves
to what’s out there and that comparison
is very dangerous. It’s always been around. The problem with social media
is that it becomes so much bigger. People take out their phones,
they’re scrolling constantly. Their brain is absorbing
all this information, they’re not actually realising,
they’re just doing it and then think, like, “Oh, OK. “Wonder if I could look like that?” I know what it takes to get
that kind of body. That’s not who
the average person is! You only have to go into shops
to see what’s left on the shelves. It’s the smalls and the mediums,
every size that I want, large or extra large, is gone. Am I part of the problem? Erm… To be honest, it does my head in. I recently took a break from my
Instagram, I deactivated my account. Just… I got fed up of it. Now, I don’t feel like I need to
change body shape. It has a massive benefit
in the bedroom. I do like to be thrown about a bit. Gay dating apps, there’s so many
categories you can fall into. Like, I fall into something called a
twink, which is someone that’s slim
and looks young. I do use the hashtag twink
to my advantage. I put it in there just to up
my followers and my likes. You get people messaging you
on a daily basis saying you’re exactly my type. Knowing that people are attracted
to slim guys like me, it’s like I can accept my body. I tried to make fun of myself and my
body before anybody else could. And then I met this girl. She was like, “Well, no, that’s
not right. “You shouldn’t be doing this. “You shouldn’t be saying that.
You’ve got feelings.” She introduced me to new foods,
encouraged me to eat more healthy. I think my attitude changed
and then my body changed after it. Now I’ll go to the gym. I’ve got
a little bit of muscle but I’m by no means fit or unfit, I’m just
average. I have gone from a bigger guy that hated himself to a big
guy that loves himself. Do I do this to impress people? I would say no. I actually train
because I just love it. It’s part of my lifestyle. A lot of people train to have an ego
or you know to make themselves scary. That’s one thing I don’t agree on. My goal originally wasn’t,
it wasn’t to win. It wasn’t to make a career out of it and then
literally I put my big toe on that stage and it felt
like I was home. I was only supposed to do it once! I’m now doing it again
and I will do it again. So I’ve definitely got the bug
for it. I feel like I have to be confident
myself. I can’t expect other people
to be confident in me if I’m not even confident
with the way I look. People think you can say whatever
you want to a man about their body and they’ll just take it. If you can support somebody that’s
overweight, if you can be nice to somebody that’s overweight
rather than the nasty comments and the bullying, then half the
battle is already won. It doesn’t matter what I’m
presenting here externally. It matters about what I feel
inside and that’s what shows.

100 Comments

  • i’m not sure if this is a popular opinion or not, but tbh i don’t care. as a female, i think that males definitely face more pressure in terms of emotional, mental and physical standards compared to females.

  • No

  • obesity could be because of this:
    Slow metabolism, eating disorder or the bad one… not being healthy…
    Be healthy don't eat like crazy, don't be so sedentary, eat fruit, and REALLY avoid bad drinks (Coca Cola, Mountain Dew, just… avoid ultra sugary drinks, juices are better than a liquid gas with some caffeine!!)

  • So hot

  • Luke is hott. I cant stop checking him out. I know this is about their struggle but oh well..

  • merhaba

  • What's Dans Instagram

  • Pussys.

  • Ok wow I feel so disappointed. Why only on the internet on this video we're talking about this…

  • Every guys who’s watching this video is gay including me 😁

  • THE GUY WITH THE FAIRY TAIL TATTOO OMFG 💖💖💖

  • I'm struggling with body image issues but now… I'll look past that.

  • mh dadt

  • ILLL that is disgusting

  • How do we fell if we had a penis 🍆

  • 😢💔👬

  • I was turned on the most by the hairy fat guy lol and if I was going to have a bf I would pick the skinny one, so maybe your beliefs are wrong? Also I never get afraid when a black guy is walking behind me. 🤷🏼‍♂️

  • I still wish I looked like any of these guys, they are sexy and healthy in my opinion.

  • I see naked man, I cluck 😅😂🤣

  • The bulemic guy's inner thoughts talking with the muscular guy: "Keep eye contact…dont become aroused."

  • MALE GENITAL MUTILATION? Let's stop acting like we live in a civilized society.

  • F

  • .

  • Embracing your imperfection makes you perfect.

  • All of these men are beautiful. Such pressure is put onto men (and women) in society to have the perfect muscular and "fit" body, the perfect hair and teeth and 6-pack and huge penis … nobody can meet these ridiculous expectations, nor should they have to. The shame is largely created by advertising and the swamp of the media. Videos like this that show that there are opportunities for men to talk about the shame — and to talk about it is to shed light on it, which is to release it. I struggle with body image too, like a lot of men probably do.

  • Gavin is beautiful. Yes, maybe he needs to lose weight. Maybe he'll have health issues later in his years, but for right now…damn, he's sexy. I'm sure he's a great to cuddle with on a cold winter night. 20 Stone = 280 pounds….yes big but luscious. Beautiful blue eye. Gavin, you're sexy.

  • Someone knows Dan's instagram account?

  • Goooooood

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_sNRGf6uwYs&t=109s

  • This is weird asf ,but humans are insanely beautiful so okay

  • What

  • Gavin eat less

  • Subtitulos en español por favor seria agradable

  • This is what they want to turn men into…. ridiculous!

  • Thank you for exposing this. Society acting like men do not have only one good way to be sexy/beautiful just like women…

  • Penis

  • Its weird

    im fat but skinny and athletic

  • I love you

  • Luke is so gorgeous

  • Did anyone see the blonde dudes fairy tale tattoo ????

  • About bloody time!

  • L

  • Thay

  • yumm

  • Oof

  • I like the skinny twink guy with white hair hes cute someone give me his Instagram or snap or what ever

  • I'm just here to compare dick sizes

  • They look Hot

  • 😊😊😊😊😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥👖👞👕👔👙👙👙👙👙

  • I love gay

  • Those 2 white guys deffo fucked each other

  • The bear is the hottest!

  • Self image is very powerful. I just now am realizing I am very handsome.

    Idk I just always thought I was the ugliest munchkin.

  • The Big Hairy Ginger Bear guy has no idea how handsome and sexy he is to a lot of guys. Then throw in the British accent…..WOOF! 🙂

  • I am 6'6" plenty of issues with my body. I commend these men for sharing their stories. But by the other commenters sexualizing this dose not help.

  • The big one is actually sexy as hell, and I know I’m not the only one that thinks that😭😭

  • Yes this is a important topic to touch on because everyone in the news media channels are not acknowledge the LGBT community

  • YOU JUST CAME HERE TO SEE DONG

  • Fairy tail!!!

  • Marc is really attractive

  • Honestly they are all hot . Personally like the skinny white guy and the other thinner guy but I know for a fact many many women that would date the big guy . My brother is a big fella and legit woman fall all over him

  • Gavin's eyes… Damn I want them too

  • Am i the only person thinking that the muscle guy Luke shouldnt be complaining about anything. I mean he can get a guy a thousand times easier than a whole lot of other guys. Y is he on this show?

  • That guy with silver hair is so cute

  • Why the heck am I watching this

  • My

  • I’ve noticed this on twitter and social media…all these guys built or hairy or bears or whatever….have 50-300K followers and have money given to them….and most have the excitement of a piece of paper….and just post “thirst traps”….and then there’s me. I just post whatever and just let myself be social. It’s a problem that especially in the gay world, they love built, muscular, hairy men…it’s superficial and I hate it.

    Love yourself!

  • 1:40
    love this guy , he remains of my childhood friend .

  • Can I suck one of ur dicks?

  • I'm a boy btw

  • this is gay as shit

  • Its good there talking about mens body issues for once. And its good there talking about mens experience of eating disorders.

  • Can I see your penis

  • Can I see your penis

  • I like the black men♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

  • I like Dan .what is stagram or Facebook ☺️☺️☺️☺️♥️♥️

  • It's doesn't mean make him naked 🤮
    Even if the men's sexy or something 🤮🤮🤮🤮

  • Women don’t have that pressure of a hour glass figure anymore, men nope we have the stupid high expectations

  • I’ll take Gavin please

  • Luke is hot

  • this is so good

  • Who is here for Gavin ? <3

  • k111 M3 p17

  • Who gives a fuck what other people think? Not me!

  • Stay strong everybody

  • Gavin is so cute 😍❤️

  • I love my body alot .

  • Damn all these guys ugly

  • ⚀⚁⚂⚃⚄⛚⚅

  • Gavin🐻

  • i love the white haired guys tats

  • i love the white haired guys tats

  • I’m a girl and I’ve seen society only thinking we have problems. But it’s also men too. All genders have bullshit to deal with.

  • 14:24 YOU CAN SEE HIS DINGALING!!!😱😱

  • For the first time in history, men have recently had pressure to look a certain way, and they can't handle it. 🙄🙄🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

  • I love men fit body and defo love men cocks mmmm

  • Thy all good looking to me hot body's

  • I want to see a penis

  • Disgusting🤢

  • That black man😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *